بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيم
Assalamualaikum w.b.t.
One night at 12.50a.m., September 22, I feel aghast. I'm writing this right now on my phone while experiencing it. I'm too scared that tears rolling down on my cheeks and I watch it drop on my shirt. I'm crying alone in my room while thinking about the future.
The future I meant isn't about what I'll become when I've grown, job I'll possibly take or whom I'm marrying with. I'm talking about the Hereafter. The Akhirah.
I just finished watching a movie called 'Knowing'. It's a story about end of the world. Everyone died due to the sun flare. I can't explain about the sun flare in detail here since that's not my main subject in this entry, so I recommend you to make research through Google by your own. It's almost like the doomsday (kiamat), but it was caused by the sun flare.The earth got destroyed. None of them could make it, of course. Watching this type of movie instantly made me think how we are going to die eventually. How it happens, at what age, by incident or killed. Are we going to die when we've collected deens enough, or when we're full of sins?
Have you ever at least once, to come over this kind of thoughts? If we're bad people today, will we ever change in the end? If we're good people today, will we stay consistent until the end and never turn to someone worse? Are we even ready to face death? Seeing someone else dying is already frightening to us. But what about when we're the ones who go through it?
I believe we all do know that the pain of death depends on our good deeds, our heart. Is it dirty with hatred and vices or is it clean with sincerity and consciousness. Even the Prophet Muhammad SAW, our one and only perfect creature, felt very hurt when he went through his death, what about the ordinary and sinful people like us? Well, that's not it.
After our soul have been taken away,what will happen to us right after that? What will happen during the assembly at the Padang Mahsyar? Do we even know that it takes a thousand years while in Akhirah? I'm crying to think if happiness that I'm getting in this world right now only last while I'm alive. What if there's no eternal happiness for me in Akhirah? What if Jannah isn't a place created for me? What if....?
I beg to you, all of you... I beg to myself. Please hold on for awhile. Obey Allah SWT, do not perform wrongdoings and always be good to people. Doing good thing is difficult because the satans always make us see that bad things are more fun and interesting. Everyday is a test, so many hurtful and rage things going on in life. We can barely feel any patience but get back to your sense and be sane. Allah SWT is asking you to enter to the place where we all should belong. He's bringing us to the place where we're away from everything but only happiness all the time. If you're still dreaming and feeling lost, slap your face or pinch yourself if you need to so that you'll awake. Just bear with this for a moment. We may think living in this world takes a long time, but oh honey. You have no idea how long will it takes in Akhirah. it's longer that you can even imagine.
Do good, be good.
Be good to everyone. Don't mind about people dissing you for things you do, if you're doing it for the sake of Allah SWT. Think about reward you'll earn and place you'll live, forever. Take a good care of your relationship with Allah, take a good care of your relationship with human. Never break your connection with neither Allah nor people. Lower your ego towards other people. You can't live by helping yourself and make yourself successful. No matter how good you are, you'll always need someone else to lend their hand to help you.
Last but not least, patience is the key. You need patience to keep doing deeds and to prevent yourself from misbehavior. It's difficult to be patient especially when you're confronting various kind of people's behavior, bad situation and stuff. But since when entering Jannah is that easy? I do believe you get my point. This is what I'm currently learning besides preparing myself for SPM. To have patience in life. I'm not a good person to begin with, but we all can always try our best to change. Let The Lord see our efforts to change for the better instead of just dreaming to be one.
Remind me if I ever fall asleep again and do improper stuff. Remind me of these things I've written when I'm drowning in this world entertainment. Your advice means a lot to me.
Wassalam.
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